So...........

So how do I move on? How do I live my life so that I am okay? Do I want to screw up my chances with someone I care about so that I'm okay as a human being? This is fucked. I can't hold someone's hand through this; I need someone to hold my hand for heaven's sakes. I'm done doing this for other people. Why is it that it's so hard for me to get my life together again? All I want is to be happy. Could I ever be happy again? I hope so. I need to believe I can be. Otherwise, why bother?